Women are fascinating creatures. Dedicated. Longing for significance. Searching for ways to be fulfilled. Looking for role models. AND Frustrated. Complicated. Overworked. Weary.

Women set the tone of the home

Many of the women I work with are either before, after, or at various stages of their marriage. Along with my own experiences, I’ve learned a lot about women setting the tone of the home.

The book of Esther in the Old Testament

I hope you will take the time to read or re-read this ancient book, full of wonderful twists and turns, so evidently orchestrated by God. It is a book full of object lessons about consequences and the triumph of good over evil. In this day and age, it is a refreshingly encouraging book to read, if you take the time to read to the end. Try to re-visit this book and read it in one sitting. Not many chapters, but jam-packed with intrigue and adventure. Ask the Lord which of these two women is closest to who you are today.

Role models. Two women.

1. Zeresh was the wife of evil Haman in the book of Esther in the Old Testament. Her husband was a complex and “needy” man. He craved honor and recognition. He was most definitely “me-centered” rather than “other-centered”. When someone crossed him, he sought revenge. He must have been difficult to live with.
   
   I’m entering the story here: Haman…Rushing home to tell his wife and friends that he alone with the King (Esther’s husband, Xeres) had been invited by Queen Esther to a banquet. AND, he also told them that Mordecai, Esther’s relative, would not bow to him. And that infuriated evil Haman more than words can express. He was fixated on the fact that Modecai would not bow when he was in his presence. He was very angry. It was “eating him up”.  He was VERY difficult to live with.
   
   This is where the woman, Zeresh, his wife, his help-meet, set the tone of the home. She could have gone either of two ways. She could have reinforced all that was good for her husband and encourage him to focus on that. She could have told him she was proud of him…stuff like that.

   Unfortunately, she did NOT choose that course.Rather, the option she chose was to reinforce Haman’s whining and anger about the ONE man in the entire kingdom that did NOT worship him. She even suggested a plan to get even. Revenge. She suggested Haman construct a platform to hang Mordecai high so everyone would see what happens to anyone that dishonors Haman. He did indeed build the gallows.

   Zeresh set the tone of her home. She encouraged her husband to do that evil thing. It was even her idea!

2. Esther was the wife of the pagan King Xeres. He had many concubines. He was a weak man, mostly wanting to party. Delegating his authority to others. It must have been difficult for this godly woman to live with this pagan king, with the pagan customs of his culture. It must have been difficult to respect him as a man. As a human being.
   
   We enter this story here: Her cousin Mordecai informed her of the evil murderous plot that Haman had cooked up to try to eliminate ALL the Jews, which would include Esther AND Mordecai as well.  At first she was afraid, but she called her people to enter a season of prayer and fasting. She knew she must seek God’s plan for how to appeal to the King to try to stop the evil deed by evil Haman. This is where that famous quote, “If I die, I die” comes in.
   
   She wisely and carefully crafted a plan. A plan that would expose evil and yet honor the position that her husband held. King. Husband. What is so amazing is that her husband was pretty much as evil as Haman. He had actually permitted the decree to go out under his signature seal. The decree to kill ALL the Jews.
   
   Yet, Esther—the subject and the heroine of this story in the Bible—after seeking that godly counsel from her “uncle” Mordecai, honored the “position” of her husband, King Xeres. She appealed to his authority. She knew the protocol of approaching the King.

   After prayer and fasting, she dressed in her finest Queenly finery and sought out her husband as he sat on his throne. She could have lost her life, but GOD gave her FAVOR with the KING. She had kept God first and appealed to Him for His intervention, and with resourcefulness and great wisdom, respectfully encouraged her husband in a way that he maintained his honor and integrity in his position as King.

   God gave her the grace and wisdom to patiently create a plan to help bring out the best of her husband and to also save her people. She encouraged her husband to do good by honoring him in the way she presented the facts of what Haman was doing. Esther set the tone of her home, the castle! And brought out the best in her husband, pagan King Xeres.

Time for meditative thought and honesty

Which woman are you? Zeresh or Esther?

Please leave a comment.

Was this helpful in your walk with the Lord? In your relationships?

If this was a blessing, share it with your “tribe”. Those you hang around with!  They will thank you!

God bless you bunches for all you do for Him!
Until next time…