Most kids go through a stage of having nightmares.
Those nightmares are often accompanied by fears. It can be a frustrating time for parents. God says often in His Word that the opposite of fear is (not courage as we would expect. Not trust. Rather, it is) LOVE. The opposite of fear is love! Hmm.
Remember how God says, perfect love (God kinda love) casts out fear? If love is the opposite of fear, what does that mean to us as parents?
First, let’s do a reality check.
When trying to get victory over the nightmare sleepless nights, a first (very important) step is to do a bit of a reality check. Oops. *Sigh* Sometimes those are a bit “convicting”. It’s Ok. We are all friends here. We want SLEEP again…so…
Be brutally honest with yourself: What are you “feeding your child” before bedtime? Is it food that is mostly full of sugar rather than protein? What are they watching on TV or video games, for instance? Is there intentional quiet time or wrestling before they are to head to bed. When you have decided that all is well in those areas, then…
Try these easy peasy steps with your kids or grandkids.
- When your child is afraid of the night, CHOOSE to be calm and hug them tightly and quietly. Say something like this: “Shhhh…Shhh…It’s OK. I love you.”
- Since God says he does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind, you can confidently remind your child that this nighttime fear is not from God, and is not His desire for them.
- To dispel the darkness, sing the song, “Jesus Love Me”. ALL the verses. Quietly and calmly, while hugging little Susie or Jimmy. And end with humming the tune w/o words the final time.
- Work on memorizing scriptures together before you turn out the light. Here’s a couple: “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” OR “God gives His beloved sleep.” Ask God to help you to BELIEVE these specific verses. You can give to your child what you don’t have yourself!
- It is always a good practice to periodically pray together over the rooms in your home. Pray for cleansing of anything not of God. Ask God if there is something you need to clear out of your home. Then, don’t delay in doing it!
- And, periodically, pray to dedicate your home to God. For His use. For ministry to each other and to others. That He will be pleased with what you watch, read, and do within your home.
- When Paul was in prison, he didn’t ask to be released. He asked to KNOW Christ MORE!
If, after you’ve done all of the above, and sleep still doesn’t come, then realize God has a higher purpose. That’s when you will want to pray for wisdom. Pray with your child. Encourage each other that this sleep problem is permitted by God to help you both know Christ on a deeper level.
Don’t lose heart. This will NOT last forever! I promise!
You CAN attain GOD’S goals for you—out of your weakness HE is strong. Here’s how:
- Tell God how hard this is for you. It’s OK to tell Him that. He already knows anyway. 🙂
- ASK for His help. He loves for “His kids” to admit that they need Him!
- Trust that He will give you the strength to endure, until you’ve learned all He has to teach you in this trial.
- Remember: He adores you. Truly! No matter what. Even if He doesn’t like something you’ve done (like yelling at Susie or Jimmy when they won’t go to sleep), He still adores you! I promise! (You can also ask Him to help you not to yell at times like this.)
- God has NOT abandoned you. I know it is hard! But you CAN do this … with His help!
- You are not alone. He is going through this WITH you.
Believe that!!! AND…I can help you with all that and more!
I understand how much Moms need a MomCourager™ Let’s talk about it sometime. To see if it might be something that would be helpful for you. The first call is FREE. To answer your questions about how MomCouragementCoaching works. To discover what it might “look like” to be coached by The MomCourager™.
Please leave a comment by clicking here. I’d love to pray for you if you are going through a sleeepless time. Just ask. 🙂
And if this kid’s nighttime fear stuff happened with your kids, but you are past it now, please encourage others by going to the blog to leave a comment. Pleeese…Tell us how you did it!
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For all you young Mom’s out there I say, Pam is absolutely right. Trust her and follow her steps and all will be well. It won’t take forever. It just seems like it.
Thanks, Pam, for your tender support of Mom’s.
Carolyn Dunn, thanks for the kind words and for sharing encouragement to to Moms to hang in there! You are so right that it SEEMS forever when in the midst of it, but God is bigger than forever!
Hi Pam, Such helpful tips for those going through this painful time. When our oldest was in 5th/6th grade, she suffered from nightmares. We were advised by a wonderful Christian counselor at her school to post a scripture on the wall above her bed that she could look at and be reminded throughout the night of God’s presence and love for her. Lots of prayer too! Thank you for encouraging moms. At any age, we need a lot of that!
Great ideas, Debbie Williamson! Seeking advice from a wise counselor and from THE WISE COUNSELOR as well, in prayer. And keeping Scripture in her visual range. Thanks for adding to our arsenal to help fight off fear!
Hi Pam,
Thanks for the inspiring thoughts and very practical advice. I hope to hold these thoughts in mind when my grand daughters struggle with nighttime fears.
Thanks Kim. So glad that you will keep it for future reference (if/when needed).